New Year's eve joke!

let see... today is new years eve!!!! T.T
here's a joke b4 2009 ends.....
what is a panda's wish for 2010??

well..... the panda wish for a colured photograph!!!

hahaha... get it??? get it??? coz.. the panda is black and white... and... u understand right?

let see... wats my new year resolution???

1. save $2000
2.study harder....
3.hope can loose the fats...
4.grow taller
5.everyone around me to be healthy and happy
6.no worries be happy..
7.have a good fren...
8.create more jokes...
9.be funnier... :D
10. no more enemies...
etc etc...... alot more.... cant fit in 1 post.....
tah.. tah.. end of post.....

2010 is coming!!

As usual... i've got nothing to post... but i just felt like posting...
let see... christmas is over... T.T that means..... ahh!!!!!
2010!!! ahh!!!!
hahaha!!! my b'day is coming ... "hint hint" hehehe.....
must start thinking of new year resolution! birthsay wishes!!!
2010 will be the year of the??? the??? aiya next yr then i will find out :]
so.... im gonna end da post now....

the end~

blah blah........ holiday is ending..... it makes me wanna cry... T.T no more sleeping late... no more waking up super late.... no more com!!!! no more games! it turns to serious.... STUDYING!!!!
its so sad... 2009 will be gone forever... isnt it sad? there won't be a 2009 anymore.... T.T ...
now i sound so emo..... its so sad... new year 2010!!! wat will it be like??? its so scary!!!!!
ah!!!!

i prefer boring hoildays to suffering in sch!!!! T.T

time flies very fast indeed... but we just cannot see it.... sad right???
how to stop it from flying??? shoot an arrow to time... like shooting a crow or something?
magical arrow.... sadly no one has it...... kill time? or shoot time? dunno lar.... next yr might not post much.... coz... its 1 yr b4 O levels!!! stress!!!! ah!!! addictedd to com .... sigh....

the end~

crap?

posting posting... but dunno wat to post so posting crappp...
aiyar... i planned to loose weight this holiday... but it turned out the opposite...
i want to grow taller too... my aim is 170cm!!! it seems impossible.... must eat more long beans...
found out that school will start at 4 Jan!!!! y??? check ur calendar!!!! hurry!!!
christmas!!! presents?? songs!! jingle bell jingel belll....
christmas is coming... are u naughty or nice? santa's watching....

homework=?

lets cut the crap and go straight to the post...

let me ask you this question..... that no one can ans......

ok.... so is home=house???

if your ans is yes... then move on to the next question..... if your ans was no... then... er ignore the next question... but no harm reading it...

if home=house.... then........... is homework=housework????

the ans is obviously... NOT!

so home not equal to house???? or are they the same??? tag your views in my cbox at the right.....

dun forget to add your name... address and phone no. so that i can contact u if u hv the best views....and get an attractive prize... nah.... just kidding... u dun nd to enter your personal info... :D dun worry.. but if u want... u still can :D

The end~

back from a LONG LONG TOILET BREAK.....
so 3rd joke..... not made by me.... but its quite funny if u understand it...
joke by spike milligan. whos Mr spike? search it on google, msn, yahoo to find out...

i've changed the joke alittle but concept still da same... :D enjoy... :]

2 thieves were chased by policemen!!!! :O
Theif A: Hey! quick hide behind this pane of GLASS , b4 they see us!!
Theif B: but you can see through it!!
Theif A: not if you close your eyes!
Theif B: You're right!

I wish this was my own joke!!!

WAIT! dun go yet!!!! i have a challenge for you!!!!
CHALLENGE:
how to make the letter "Y" with only 1 finger???

the end....

3 jokes in one day???

well... I'm posting again! :D yes! there will be jokes... not only 1 joke... but 3!!! ha ha!
feeling excited!!!??? OK then sit back and enjoy the jokes...... :D

this joke that I'm gonna tell u... is gonna be quite.... i dunno how to explain... i didn't really spend much time on this joke... so here's the 1st joke... (appetizer)

Qn : wat do u call a cat with a blank mind???
[i guess you all hv alr known the ans....]

anyway the ans is BLANKET (blank-cat)

now u noe y i dunno how to describe this joke.... lame? FUNNY?[not!] or just too simple?
.............................................................................................................................................................

2nd joke... also created by me... hmm i dun think you will understand this one.... but nvm...

two ppl... were driving and they got abit lost along the road... so they looked at the map .....

husband: help me look out for a flyover
wife: OK
suddenly the wife saw a fly on the car windscreen....buzz buzzz
wife: hey! there's a fly over there!!!
husband[looking frantically at the road for the flyover]
husband: where got??
wife: there on the windscreen!!!!

i love this joke!!!! but dunno if you all do....
.........................................................................................................................

3rd joke will be revealed after a toilet break good bye...

the end.....

fire station joke?

yay!!! i found another of this blogskin!!! yay!!! heres a joke to celebrate... this... this.... thing..?
ok... here goes....

ahma and her son ah dong are at home one day.... sunddenly a fire broke out.. AH!

Ahma: OMG! faster call the FIRE STATION!!!
Ah dong: aiya...no nd to call lar... sms them can alr...
Ahma: they got hp meh?
Ah dong: yar wat... their no. start with 9 mah...

funny?? funny then laugh lar... not funny... ? also laugh... hahaha....

CREDITS! i would like to thank....

MELISSA NG: she did the words for the joke...
AND...
ME ofc.... i tot of this lame joke... and posted it....
and most of all i would like to thank my fellow viewers of this blog.... that hv liked the jokes that i posted.....

i dun really post my own joke... reason is.... i hv a thought block..... or just lazy to think....
hope u all like this joke... i noe its not really good but.... just pretend to laugh... heehee...

the end...

found it..

FOUD IT!!!
i really miss the old skin... but there was an image error thing..... theres another almost similar skin but there was some error at the side.... so... yea..... i choose this one becoz it has a simlar colur as the old skin...

IM GONNA FIND ANOTHER BLOG SKIN!!!

18th NOV 2009

posting today! i just felt like posting....

haha.... (i just laughed randomly....)

ive got a joke for you all! arent you all happy??? haha...
heres one of my mad doc jokes again! refrence from a comic in the net....

AHBOO has a public speech this afternoon so he feels nervous and decided to go see a doc..... ... ....
AHBOO: Doc!! i think i hv butterflies in my stomach!!!
Mad Doc: Oh! i got a cure!!! here take this! drink this and u will be fine!
AHBOO: Wats this???
Mad DOC: oh... its just insect repellent.....
hope u like it :D

the end ~

oh no... dunno why th blog skin like that... the designer might hv removed or deleted the skin or something like that!! how am i gona get it back!!! arh!!!
sigh... next yr is a brand new class... new faces new ppl.... scary... and esp new teachers....
sigh~~~~ i dun wish to be 15 yrs... being 15 to me is very old alr..... why cant i stay young 14... T.T....im not planning to celebrate my b'day next yr... im staying 14 forever!! muahahaa....

The end~

very short post...

Today.... i will.... post.... a joke.... hahaha!!!! and i will not gv u the ans... muahahaha...

Qn: there are 10 copycats on the boat...1 jumps out... how many are there left...?

rmb to tag the ans....this qn was taken from one of the facebook quizzes abt common sense....

haha... use ur brain ar!!
 
ANS: ... u should know the answer lah~ I dont have to spell it out:D

i just rmb that there is the amaths hw... to do...

the end...

nike jokes

feel so tired now... slept at 0330 today.... no mood to post... but to keep my blog alive... i hv no choice...

heres a joke for u all:

Elderly lady: I hv had enough with those darn kids! they hv gone far too much....!
Policemen: hmm... do u recognise any of them?
Elderly lady: Im sure one of them is named Nicky..
Police: how do u noe?
Elderly lady: i saw the name embroided on his bag...
Policemen: can u spell the name for me...
Elderly lady: N.....I.....K......E....
Policemen: =.= thats a brand name....
elderly lady: really??

this joke was from melissa ng.... whom got it from readers digest.....
but i changed it alittle so as to avoid copyright... :D

yup.. thats alll

The end....

yawn... its fri!!!! yippee!!! i wish next week doesnt come... hate next week... T.T



After seeing the scary movie in sch abt alien invasion in earth ... i think i dun want to get a job abt earth... BUT... i will still do geog next yr... unless the teachers change the choices of my choice.... i feel that geog is easier....



haha .... i think i want to be a pathologist.... a person who cuts up dead body... muahaha...



joke.... time....


little ooloo went to the zoo one night.....

SUDDENLY! little ooloo saw something with a big head and 2 big black eyes...

he told his mummy that he saw an alien....

.....

but actually.. it was a PANDA...





so? funny?? sigh... many zits on my face... must go facial....wear facial mask.....



should my words for the post hv colour?? u ask me i ask who?? lol... :D



tmr is a sat! can sleep until late late... so.. dun call or sms me b4 12pm... i wont reply.....



my b'day coming !!! 2 months and 12 days left ar... hope next year... got many many present....



many many red packet..... :D many many cake to eat!!!


the end... ^^

never post for 2 days or more........ i hv a very good reason.... because after i come home from school... i nap for 3-4 hrs.... until dinner.... so here's my everyday routine...
school>home>lunch>sleep>dinner>sleep... and the cycle repeats itself all over again.... {similar to a pig... but only pigs dun go to sch...}

let me spice up my post with something interesting for u and embarassing for me....
today... 1st period of sch.. i will describe it as hectic... confusing yet embarrasing..
receive to paper at the same time eng and bio......
CONFUSION: (eng)-marks added wrongly
(bio)- got extra slip of paper....mcq marks thing...
then ar i saw the bio mcq/section A marks is 8 then i saw the paper section A is 7 so... tot can gain one mark..

here's the EMBARASSMENT part...

bio teacher: yes?
me: the mcq marks wrong....

then guess wat she said.... the paper was eng paper....!!! i saw wrongly.... so....yea... paiseh lor....

understand??? if u dun then gd.... its too embarrasing to explain... T.T

i've got nothing better to post... sigh.. next week so busy... cca everyday....

oh yes!!!! b4 i end this post!!! let me introduce u all to DONUT EMPIRE...

everyone must try!!!! super delicious..... i will recomend the oreo flavour one...
and!! if u are a student... show ur IC then will hv discount eh!!!!

dun forget to try!!!! ratings: 5 out of 5

one more thing .... dun forget to tag....!!!

ZZZ...sleepZZZ

blob...blob.... as u can see the tittle... is abt ... sleep... ofc im not going to write a boring post abt sleep.... so dun run away!!!

haha!! dunno y these few days i keep on sneezing without a reason..... ahchoo..oo... i just sneezed..

haiyo.... i tried to sneeze with my eyes open... but... cant.... i also tried to sleep with my eyes open... its called daydream... it was a success!!! so if u talk to me and i dun reply u... then it means im sleeping with my eyes open....

but .... dun try this w/o parental guidence... Lametoufu here... has 100 yrs experience... but im not old!!! yea.... AND! if u are really really... very very... extremely damn sleepy... then this daydreaming thing doesnt work.... so... dun daydream in ur class... coz u would not noe how u look like when u are day dreaming..... u will be staring in blank space... u may even be smiling...
then teachers... ar... they will catch u... daydreaming.. then u "wan dan" ["die'' in chinese]

oh yes! my gmail.. has been disabled.... dunno why... so those who always send me email.. to gmail.. pls convert to Hotmail...... MY gmail ar!!!! why like this!!!

the end...

3 jokes a day!!

yes!!! Its finally OVER!!!woohoo! but cannot celebrate yet... coz... there will always be results day... sigh... T.T

so long no post... but that doesnt mean im gonna post a long long post...
yes.. i noe i owe u all alot of jokes... here is 2 for u all...

1st joke
Qn: why cant u teach the baby to say daddy and mummy at the same time??
its common sense..... ponder ponder....

give up alr? no fun eh u all....

Ans: bcoz if u teach the baby both at the same time he might accidently say dummy....
(daddy+mummy=dummy)..... so instead of teaching the baby to say daddy or mummy they call u dummy...! i noe this is not funny.... i tried my best alr.... so gv me face and laugh....

2nd joke...
abt a stupid kidnap story... and the advantage to be fat...

one day the kidnapper wanted to kidnap a rich family's boy....
then the kidnapper car very the small... the boy... very the fat...
so.... the boy cannot fit in the car.... so in the end no kidnap....
The end....

i noe wat u gonna say... lame right....?

anyway.... my fren melissa ng... begged me to post her joke... its called the funny sms conver.
Melissa Ng's joke:
HL: lol
melissa Ng:u lol me?!!! i lol lol u back!!!
HL: haha
melissa: u haha me?!!! i haha u back!
HL: ( is said sth lame but i forgot wat it was)
Melissa:...speechless...but i dun noe y im still talking


the end of post....

chinese compo

im back after... so long.... unfortunately exams are not over... cant escape it... T.T
sigh... chinese tuition nd to write compo abt an experience in the bus... at first my mind was blank... but then i thought of wat to write.... and i will share wif u all...


one day... i boarded the bus.... the bus was crowded... very crowded.... not long a pregnant lady boarded the bus... suddenly everyone pretended to fall asleep... then me... the kind one gave up the seat to the pregnant lady....

so i had to stand at a corner... suddenly a scream scared me leh... the pregnant lady screamed and her legs dunno why also fly up......

without thinking... i shouted... "Ah!! the lady is giving birth alr!!! got any doctor in the bus or not???"


No one replied... they just stared at me.....

then the pregnant lady said: shout wat shout?!! i scared by a cockcroach only... not giving birth lar...!" then everyone started laughing... even the bus driver also laugh....

luckily... reached the bus stop alr ... i ran down the bus quickly.....

ofcourse... this story is no true lar... its all in singlish..... haha..

I nd my energy food!! chocolate!!! CHOCOLATE!!!
i like ferrero rocher (dunno spelling but i spell it like tat)
I also like ASSORTMENT.... the hazel nut kind... yummy...

i got this thing on my face... dunno if its a pimple or a mosquito bite...

wishing for osim u Dream... the massage chair.... (warh i chg subject so quickly)

ppl like me nd a gd massage u know... :D ....

the end...

HDB joke

hello!!! erm... yea... couldnt resist the keyboard.... i tot of a joke but... i forgot alr eh.... i will try to rmb while posting this post... so wat to post.... sigh... aryar... next fri is the dreadful nightmare of the frightening tracks of 2.4km!!!! arh!!!! hope the teacher dun come... lets see... i still cant rmb the joke... sorry lar... stm..... i know all of u want joke.. so now im gona tell a joke from a tv show..

here it goes...
there is this HDB... it has 12 floors
the floors are jan, feb, march , april, may, june, july, aug, sep, oct, nov, dec...
(funny names for floors... but oh well...)
Every HDB has a lift...
so the question is: how do u call the lift?give some time to think...

blah blah... think think....

lalala

cmon think harder...

u noe the ans??

no? then u want me to tell u the ans???

ok the ans is.....
wait... if u hv forgotten the question... like me... got stm... pls kindly place ur mouse on the scroll thing... and scroll up....

so the ans is.... u press the button the call the lift....
aiyo.. so easy.. also dunno... tsk tsk...
i shall not remind anyone abt.. the exams.... >> EXAMS ARE COMIN!!! EVERYONE PANIC!!
no... im just kidding... erm...if u are really panicking... then.... erm.... just take deep breaths... but it doesnt really help...>>>for me....

NOTE to all: Pls read my blog often... my blog is boring without tags... and... and..readers....

is my blog too boring? i noe... no colour... black and white is nicer right??? nvm...

the end...

I had a dream.... Nightmare.... But I forgot wat it was....
I can't be hyper... If I'm hyper... I'll be sacarstic one... Then ppl will gv me the look ..... >.>
Then I will gv them the look .... <.<
Nothing funny... Darn... I drank too much coke this week... And ate alot of cake... Sure gain weight...
Sigh... Sch is reopening loh.... Means 2.4km run is nearing loh... Tat means... T.T...... I hate running.... Waste my energy...
Wats the fastest way to lose weight...? I'm not going on a diet for sure... I can't leave without chocolate!!! Tat means it
Only leaves me with one thing... Excersise.... Ah! Terrible word! The second word I hate... Blah blah....



The end...

today is 09/09/09!!! Must post on this auspicious day!!!
Random post... Blah... I nd help wif holiday hw!!!
Sept holiday is so short... T.T

The end!

MAD doc

hmm...here's my story today... Rmb the time I went to the doctor to check my brain joke?? U dun rmb ar? Neh-mind...

Today....me & my mom went see a mad doctor... Here was the conversation....

Mom: so wats wrong wif her..?
Mad doc: er... Wat do u think... ?
Mom: u asking me?
Mad doc: ya... They say.. The mother knows best...
Mom: =.=

Hahaha!! U do know tat this is just a joke right...?
Funny? Pls coment...

Nowadays.... My jokes are boring...
I prefer myself to be boring... If I too hyper... I may be very irritating... And ppl will hate me... And I dun want tat to happen T.T ... Therfore... I will be boring from now on...

The end...!

THE JOKE OF THE DAY....

Joke time....

What object has 3 hands?
Ans: clock!!!

Yea... I agree not funny....



Wat comes before 11?
Ans: 7
Get it? 7 eleven???

=.=

The end...

hmm... Let's see.... I've made up a joke during Eng lesson...
So here it goes...

Eng teacher... Gave out worksheet... Then some ppl dun hv....

E.T(eng teacher) : got any extra??
No one ans...

Then E.T said: those have 2 ws... do the work 2 times...
Student: then wat if got 3?
E.T: then do 3 times...
Me: then those dun hv... No nd to do?
Then suddenly ppl gv back the extras...

This joke is not funny right.... But I think it's funny...

The end!

judge joke?

eh.... Today is teacher's day eve! So can come home early? No... Not really.....
Tmr is a holiday...can play but dun play too much....
Feel like learning tap dancing... Dunno y... Maybe becoz I like the sound of the shoe ...
Here's a joke for laughter....

Judge: so........ do u pled guilty??
Ah beng: I said a thousand times! I didn't do it!
Lawyer: object!
Judge: yes?
Lawyer: he didn't say a thousand times! He only said 5 times!
Judge and ah beng: =.=

Heh heh.... Veh funny right? =.= if u didn't like it... Just pretend u like it... :)

The end...

oh ley! Next week miss 2.4 run again !
I am now posting crap...

Maybe I'll post a poem.. Abt...FISHBALL!!!

Fishball:
It's not a fish,
It's not a ball,
Then why isit called fish ball?

Hahaha!! Short poem!!! Good? Pls coment!!

The end!

missing dog joke

I feel so lucky... I missed 2 times of 2.4km run retest!!! :D

Here's a joke for those who hv a pet at home!

Harry: our dog is missing!
Policeman:why don't u put notices around the area?
Harry: don't be silly! Our dog can't read!!

Haha! So, take good care of ur pets or teach them how to read!

The end...

""""".....""""""..."""""" < morse code!! =.=
Here's another hypnotizing trick u can do by urself or others...

1st step: say milk 7 times.... Milk milk milkmilk milkmilk milk milk..
2nd step: ans this question: wat do cows drink?

Did u say milk??? Haha! Cows drink water mah...

The end ....

finally it's Friday!! Yipee!! It means next day there's no horrible sch where I'm always alone.... I'm at home wif my family!!! No one to insult me... My life will come back... eesh I just feel dead in sch... Yes as u have not noticed... My mood is down this week:::""":::""" I will now post a joke to cheer me up...

Joke....
Judge: I'm sending u to prison for 3 months!
Convict: what's the charge?
Judge: there's no charge everything is free...

Hahaha! Good one lametoufu!! Nice joke!!!
Thank you thank you!
Sigh... That made me laugh for 7secs....
Oh well...

The end...

...

test and tests and more tests! this week is full of darn tests!
ok erm.... sigh i cant think of any good jokes... now my blog is boring like....

i found out that i hv a slow brain... ppl keep telling me im slow... they say, "eh! HL u very slow eh can faster?"
I think slowly ok! dun nd to rub it in... i alr noe im slow! why must u all still hurt my feelings? u think i want to be slow meh? i cant help it! my size alr like tat u still expect me to be fast...
maybe it was becoz many ppl hit, push, knock my head to many times.. causing my brain to think slowly... thats my only logical explanation to be slow... if its not this reason than i dunno any other reasons...

here are some ppl who say im slow... not mentioning names...
*tuition teacher
*frens
*family
*strangers?

i hate this slow problem! i wonder wat can i eat to cure this problem... can it even be cured??
im going mad! but i just dun show it.. im controlling it... im worried one day i might kill myself, or someone...

yes after reading this post u must think im a dangerous person.. dun worry i still hv self control i wont kill anyone... and i still think tat my life is precious...

i will now sadly end my post here...

the end...

national day is coming!

although the title is"national day is coming!" im not really gonna tok about political stuff... i wonder... where ppl get the national flag from... the one to put outside their hse?
i also one eh... but dunno where to get...

here's some of the ans i get when i asked... :
*some say the government give to every estate for free...
*some say u must go to the national day parade and it will be in the goodie bag...
*some say they DIY the flag...
but alot say>>> DUNNO...

different ppl say different ans... which one is true dunno... if u noe can tag the ans...



so yea...tats all...

HAPPY NATIONAL DAY! RMB HANG UR FLAG OUTSIDE AR! DUN FORGET!!!

the end....

im back!

Yay im back!!! today... im "more" free... so decided to post...
dun worry ppl... posting will resume to its normal state very soon...

lets see todays topic... will be about bathroom....
u see... i have these bathroom stickers in my bathroom...
and it looks very creepy... y? coz when i shower the stickers are like staring at me...
there's nemo, mickey mouse, winnie the pooh, snoopy... all of them staring... creepy...

ok lets chg the topic... its too creepy to talk abt it...
so ppl usually say elmo is linked to emo.... i also dunno y... if u ask me...
i think Nemo should be linked to the word emo... it sounds closer than elmo...

haha.. so long no joke right? here's one for u all to enjoy...


While at the funeral of her own mother,she met a man
who she did not know. She thought he was 'amazing'.
She believed him to be her dream partner so much that she
fell in love with him right there, but never asked for his
number and could not find him. A few days later she killed
her sister.
Question:
What was her motive for killing her sister?

the ans is... the woman hopes that if she kills her sis, the man will turn up at the funeral again... the ans quite crazy... if u guessed it u are also crazy... jk...
this post can go on longer but its time for me to say bb... T.T

the end...

Lametoufu is back!!! there has been many complains abt the prob of blogging..... [i sound like the blog creater...] dun worry it will be solved soon... i think..... at least still can blog wat....

im gonna talk abt something funny yesterday[thursday]

geog lesson: i smelled popcorn
MT lesson: i smelled twisty!!
Lit lesson : i smelled hamburger...
after sch... i smelled chicken essence...

*strange*......
maybe i was imagining stuff.... smellucinating...

no joke today.....it takes time to think of a good joke leh!

good mood=can think of jokes
bad mood= cannot think of jokes to blog... so just copy joke book.....

ok tats all folks...

*end*

bata?

ok.... im back..... here's a joke for all of u loyal readers out there!

this joke... i created by my self.....

what do u call a path for the mad people?

ans: physcopath!!! get it?? no? nvm...

do u think hypnotising is impossible... well here's a trick to prove it wrong....
i will make u say the wrong word....

ok... 1st say "bata" 10 times... bata bata bata... bata... bata bata.....

.....

now read this word out loud>> DATA



did u say dah-ta?
haha! i tricked u!
its suppposed to be dae-ta

now do u believe in hypnosis???
muahahahaha.....

u can try this on ur frens... i tried on 2 ppl.... they both said dah-ta...!!! :D

the end....

Bedrooms DO's & DON'T

so long no post! coz very busy wif hw....
i have no joke to post today....
Lemme tell u some do's an dont's for ur bed room...

DON'Ts:

*DON'T put ur bed under the aircon... coz if the aircon leak... u will be sleeping in a swiming pool...

* DON'T put plants in ur bed room... it is not becoz of the competion wif oxygen... its becoz... at night... ur plants will eat everything! Even U! rmb to lock ur plants in a cage....

*DON'T put a clock in ur room.... instead keep a rooster...
if u put a clock in ur room u will keep seeing the time... and u cant go to sleep... the rooster will help wake u up...

*DON'T put a TV in your room... coz... sometime u will tend to sleep wif the tv on... in the end the tv watch u not u watch the tv.... :D

now for the DOs

DOs

*DO sleep in ur bed room!

thats all folks....

*tHe EnD*

The barney phobia...

i cant believe this! im afraid of barney! its a long story... it all started when i was dreaming... then dunno why suddenly dreamt that this purple dinosaur was chasing after me..... scary....the way it ran was similar to frankenstein... u noe... the monster that walks with the arms stretched out... ok... then... i woke up and realised i was just dreaming... :)

sorry today no joke... because i cant find any good ones to post...

No i cant just end abruptly... disappointing u all....
oh well... all i can say is... ...

TOO BAD:D HOW SAD:D

jkjk... im not gonna end like this... let me post the famous toungue twister to end off my post...

She sells sea shells by the sea shore.
The shells she sells are surely seashells.
So if she sells shells on the seashore,
I'm sure she sells seashore shells.

for more fun tongue twisters.. vist this website: http://www.americanfolklore.net/tonguetwisters/funny-tonguetwisters.html

ITS LOL TIME!

ok todays joke....
this happened in egypt....sorry i dunno egyption lang so i use singlish...

egyption little boy: daddy.. next time u pass away... should i rmb u as daddy or mummy??

Egyption daddy: ofcourse daddy lar!

egyption little boy: but when u pass away u will be wrapped up an preserved as a mummy!

Egyption daddy: =.="

hahah... tat made me lol for.... 3 secs??? not really tat funny but its quite funny! haha.. tats all dun be greedy for jokes... too much jokes is bad for ur health... so bb now...

the end...

joke

im so sleepy these days... when im sleepy... i dun think much.. therefore... my jokes will be boring.. sorry for boring u ppl... lemme try again.... now...

Q. can u name 3 consecutive days without using : mon,tues,wed,thurs,fri,sat,sun??




give up???


the ans for the joke .... is ...........

yesterday... today...and tomoro!!!


tats all folks...

the end....

The usual

yes... its the usual... joke....

Q: Why is "u" the happiest letter???
A: becoz... its in the middle of FUN !!!

not funny??? fine... one more joke....

Q: how does the letter "A" help a deaf lady?
A: it can make 'her' "hear".....

yup... tats all.. bb

the end...

typical day...

time for a joke....

Qn: what has a tail and a head.... and very useful to us??
give up???

try harder.....

the ans .... is.... : a COIN!!!

my blog is quite boring nowadays right??? i hv pratically nothing to post... im posting crap..

very few ppl visit my blog... im thinking of advertising it.. but how??? oo!! those reading my blog... invite more of ur frens families, come read my blog.... so it will not be so dead.... i dun mind crap on my tagboard too... its fun to hv some spamm.... :D

watched the charity show..... dun ask me abt donating coz i cant donate... 1 call alr $5!!! not that im stingy.. its becoz the economic is low and i hv to save money to buy Osim u dream....(JK)

B to the O to the R to the I to the N to the G to the !!!

the end....

joke??

joke ??? lets seee..

ar! i tot of a joke... here it goes...

One day...i was baking a cake wif my sis...
suddenly... i threw the butter out of the window of our flat.... i live in the 10th floor...
here was the conversation after i threw the butter...

Sis: Oi y u throw the butter out of the window? last butter leh!!!

Me: relax.... i just wanted to see the butter-fly....

sis: =.=''

the end...

PINK!

post the joke joke... popular demand.....

there is this pink single story hse.... everything is pink in colour.....
living room, kitchen, sofa all pink colour.... everything pink.... so wat colour is the stairs?

PINK? no.... didnt i say it was a single story hse? theres no stairs!

The end...

sorry... i cant reveal the phobia... its too scary... for me...

i have this phobia... i cant seem to overcome it.... its frightening and its affecting my life... i cant control it anymore.... i need to write it out! Its too painful... I cant control it anymore.... im not joking. i have a terrible past in pri4 and actually i didnt want to rmb it but when i came to sec sch it made me rmb wat had happen.....

joke

sorry today no joke coz... dunno of any.. oo... i just tought of a joke.. lemme tell u...

Boss: where u live?
employer: serangoon
Boss: what block?
employer: nothing block my house....
boss: -.-"'

....tired...
my horrible experience in pri 4 is repeating again!!!! pls stop!!

The end

eek...!!

T.T.. nd to go for wedding dinner.... that means free food... XD BUT must gv red packet.... T.T...

i wan a O.U.D!!! Osim U Dream..>>massage chair... in the advertisment... for

christmas!!! Who can buy for me??? pls? wat i said pls.... why no one wants to buy for

me... T.T

...Osim U dream......

the end...

H1N1... no talk...

warh... H1N1 is very near... we must be cautious.....
Here are some precaution... :
*cover ur mouth and nose if u sneeze or cough...
*wash ur hands frequently
* DUN TALK UNECCESSARY....
Here is why u must take the above precaution...
*if u dun cover ur mouth....wat will happen? just see the sneezing advertisement... wat channel? i think every channel also hv...

*wash ur hand....when ever u can.... wash with soap then at least got hope.... tats wat Phua Chu Kang said on sars rap...

*dun talk ar? this one... i made it up... if u talk ..and u got the H1N1..choi....touch wood... then u talk saliva come out land on the person ... then.... hospital lor....

ok... enough H1N1 talk... dun play play... its serious....

i just put a video abt talking dogs... its funny!!! enjoy....

the end...

Deal or no deal...?

today... no joke... becoz my brain sot from the exam cannot think of any joke...
but i can tell u a real life story... dun worry is a short wan... sot wan haha get it sot wan?...
ok nvm... so here it goes... :

One day b4 the lit exam... i was asking everyone {ok maybe not everyone} wat is METHAPHOR!!! didnt noe mah... i ask person A, she say she not sure so i ask person B...
she said wont be tested.... then i did something that i shouldnt do... betting.... so i said..
Me: if cum out in exam u treat me icecream....
Person B: then if never come out u treat me....

then guess wat?? i suay lor.... lose lor... now must treat person B icecream... T.T
hope Person B forget abt the deal... heh heh...

moral of the story: gambling and betting is definately bad for u.... dun even try it... i 1st try also loose....

the end... :D

<><><><><>

post jokey now....

Q. so why did the tomato blush???

.......
..
...
.
...
Ans: Becoz he saw the salad dressing!!!
Since i will not be posting for a long long long long time.. until exams are completly over....
I will post another joke!! :)

Q. why did the cannibal (person eat person... :o) not eat the commedian???

Ans: becoz it tasted funny!!!

The end...

untitled titl...

New recruitment to the lame gang... Melissa ng... yay welcome....

Now is time for a joke......
Me: U must not eat pineapple from a pineapple tree....

Someone: why leh???

Me: bcoz....

Someone: bcoz wat???

Me: Bcoz pineapple dun grow on trees....

Someone: -_-''

Hi all....
warh... so many ppl say im boring.... why an i boring?
coz i want 2 break Guiness record... the most boring person in the world!!!
so must train my boredness everyday...

Ok next...
Today i just join my new gang... its call the lame gang...
cool right?

members:
*Lame Toufu
*Lame abalone
* Me....

Our gang motto:
*If someone ask u to do sth.. always pretend u dunno..
* always ask for money even though u hv...
* Always pretend...

Our gang pledge:
We the members of the lame gang...
Pledge ourselves to be lame and lazy forever
regardless of critisim, bullies, and others....
to strive and gain for the guiness record...
so as to achieve money and more money...

the end...

sports day

there's nothing to post... but 2day is sports day...my worst day of my life...
sit in the hot sun.... got shelter also like no shelter...
forgot to bring umbrella to block the sun...

what to bring the next spots day.... :
*umbrella
*aircon.... (just kidding..)
*cardboard (foolscsap paper) to fan myself
* 1 bottle of ice...
* sunblock
*big bag to put all the free mineral water....
* myself!!!....

thats all folks....

The MAN....

so the day after yesterday...means today...
i held a man's hand...
and tat man has a wife!!!!

guess who the man is???





 the ans to the  joke... is.... my father....

i went to the clinic

today went to this clinic to check my brain... the doctor was unPROFESSIONAL...
here is our conversation:

me: doctor i nd to check my brain...

unprofessional doctor: u hv mental problem ar?

me: no... i just need to check... hurry up lar i pay ur cosultation hourly leh...

uprofessional doc: ok..ok...

checking in process....

unprofessional doc: ok i have checked ur brain, and....

me: and wat?

unprofessional doc: your left brain has nothing right... your right brain has nothing left...

me>>>>>fainted/peng san/ yun dao/

the end~~~

actually i didnt go to the clinic... the bove was just a joke...

Poem about my life

.... so im quiet in sch.... y cannot?
y must i talk when i dun wan to...
because im soft doesn't mean im useless...
y must i be loud to do presentations or Drama??

{sorry just venting my anger...}

heres a poem abt my life......

Dunno why I end up like this..
when im just amiss...
It shows no mercy....
which holds me to misery...

This is so not right...
which i cannot fight...
I live in this state,
Is it becoz of fate?

I am now wondering...
how am i going...
to end this,
never ending misery....

some words may not be able to be seen... coz of colour... i got bad sense of matching colours...
no poll result yet....

poll results+another poll

yay more ppl doing dah polls.... :}
heres the results....

more ppl say their left hand is longer....

weird right.....

so... next poll... :O

u answer the phone on the...???
a) right side
b) left side

Oo... its a hard decision.....
everyone that come 2 my blog must tag the poll ans... or i will... .... ...

haha just scaring u to do the poll.... xD

The Poll...

ok so i noe why ppl dun do my polls....

here's a "better" poll for all of u.....

which hand is longer?
a) right hand
b) left hand

choose wisely...

Poll 7005

Im posting another poll...that no one will do...

Which one u prefer?
a) Sat
b) Sun

I Must remind u all tat its free and....fun??
Pls Do ..... Me bored .....

TITTLE...??

so....no ones doing me polls....
why???? T_T its a simple poll....
Finally got rid of the worth 10$$ thing
im not worth 10$$.....
my polls are free... i made it up myself... no copy rights... so it should be
leagal.... *sigh*

Heres a knock knock joke to cheer ME up!!!

knock knock...
who's there?
knock....
knock who?
knock you!!!!

hahahahah.... that made me happy for 12 secs.... i counted....

tittle???

yea.. no poll results yet... coz not enough results..haha...
just post for fun...
sigh... i think ppl get stressed at home more then in sch.. or maybe opp...
for me when i get home i hv to do hw... study tests... tats why kinda stress..only KINDA
but in sch (sorry im using the connectors in the beginning of the sentence.... its wrong! do not do this in o levels or else....) ok so in sch just listen to teacher blagging[ talk+blabber+nagging=blagging...] and also enjoy aircon...maybe only fan...

i suddenly think of a poll question....

when do u feel more stressed?
(a) at home
(b) in sch

my ans is alr above....
rmb to give the reason also.... coz i wanna noe....

recruitment

lametoufu is super lonely....
looking for members to join her gang......

Requirement:
-same sch
-must not be in any gang
- dun mind if im emo/dun talk or any other flaws...
-no sabo me
-no need to go for recess

if interested or any queries pls tag on the cbox...

{currently looking for 2-3 members only}

P for poll....:D

today's poll.....

Do you prefer to:
a) gain weight
b) loose weight

choose wisely.....bear in mind that u can vote as many time for ur choice...
but u can only vote for one choice........

poll result

its time for the poll results......

the results.......

american idol won....

but i vote for s'pore idol.... so its a TIE!!!

thats all folks... stay tune for the next poll....

POLL

poll time!!!!
My polls are not so famous.... T.T
When i grow up im gonna become a good poller.... ( if there's a thing called 'poller')

ok today's poll will be....

which one u prefer?
* America idol
* singapore idol

vote!!!! now!!!! Its free!!!

poll results....

the results.....of the poll........

its a TIE!!!!!

It has never happen b4... its amazing....extradinary......